The double standard…but which one?

So, some people who know me would say that I can be a bit sexist. Mostly this is sexist against women.

Truth be told, I’ve never had the best experiences with women, they can seem to get to the core of a person’s insecurities like nobody’s business, without even realising they do it. When I think about my time at school, I always think of the girls as the ones who gave me a hard time more than the boys. That judgement, that childish sniggering, whispering, fake friendships, and of course, the ever-present bitchiness.

So sometimes my views can be quite negative when it comes to women vs men.

This is not one of those moments actually, yet some of my friends might think it is.

Domestic Abuse.

Domestic abuse, it goes both ways...
Domestic abuse, it goes both ways…

I know – it’s a little more of a downer than most of my blog posts tend to be – except perhaps a recent one about a friend who is struggling, but it’s something which really really irritates me.

So – a woman gets abused by her man. Quite rightly people are shocked, upset, sympathetic, willing to help where they can, willing to vilify the man.

A man gets abused by his man. If I’m honest, I’ve never really looked into/noticed views about this – so unfortunately I have nothing to comment on here – but would welcome your thoughts?

A woman gets abused by her woman. As before, except that I would imagine people would have a fair amount of sympathy with the abused woman

A man gets abused by his woman. Whenever I mention this, I’m met with the opinion that essentially, this man isn’t really a man if he’s letting his woman beat him.

A friend of mine was in a relationship with a woman who was, to put it simply, a bully. During their relationship, she regularly punched him in the face, bottled him once or twice and she destroyed his car as well. When I tell people this story (leaving out names of course) – guys often laugh and call him a pussy or similar, and women sometimes have sympathy, sometimes don’t believe me.

Because my friend would never hit a woman, even one who is hitting him. When he reported this to the police, they LAUGHED at him.

This was shocking to me, as have been people’s responses, especially when I don’t give details, and simply say ‘my friend got beaten up by his girlfriend’ – it’s been met by ‘lads’ finding it hilarious, I guess just like the police did.

To say this made me angry is a minor understatement, but it really does show an example of some views and opinions about the British public in general when it comes to something like domestic abuse. It’s no surprise that charities and organisations set up to help victims of physical domestic abuse often feature images of women with bruises and cuts, but think about it – do you ever really see images of men in the same situation? I can’t think of an example.

Google ‘domestic abuse’ and look at the images. I counted 21 images of women suffering, and 3 of men. Which really brings it home.

I don’t really have much more to say after that statistic


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